If you frequent Pornhub, you’ve probably stumbled onto a video where the person getting penetrated says, “Breed me, Daddy,” right before the man ejaculates into them without a condom. If this turns you on, you’re not alone, and you may have a breeding kink.
What is a breeding kink?
A breeding kink is a type of cum fetish which eroticizes unprotected sex and cumming into your partner’s vagina or anus with their enthusiastic consent, explains Gigi Engle, a certified sex and relationship psychotherapist and sex expert at the LGBTQIA+ dating app, Taimi.
For male/female couples, you’re turned on by the idea of becoming pregnant or making your partner pregnant. (Emphasis on the word idea, as people with a breeding kink are not actually trying to get pregnant.) Still, the kink exists among queer couples or people who cannot get pregnant.
“Gay men find a breeding kink hot, especially bottoms, because even though [cisgender] men can’t get pregnant, they often fantasize about the risk and thought of getting pregnant,” explains Dr. Lee Phillips. Not to mention that unprotected sex and breeding/getting bred can be a very intimate experience. “It can also be emotional because the person feels they have a piece of the person inside them, making them feel closer to the person,” Phillips says.
How does it differ from a pregnancy kink?
While there is overlap, Engle explains that a pregnancy kink usually involves eroticizing already being pregnant. So, the kink may include an appreciation for how the body is changing during pregnancy or being so in love with your partner and grateful that they’re bringing your child into the world.
What turns people on about a breeding kink?
Like pretty much every kink out there, there are multiple reasons why someone may find a breeding kink arousing.
Connection and intimacy
“Honestly, for me, it’s about connection,” adult performer Skye Blue says. “Like how much further can you connect with a human than the THOUGHT of making something together? And I say thought very strictly in this economy.”
She continues that she feels sorry if you’ve never had a man tell you he loves and wants to breed you. “To trust someone so fully that you would let them cum inside you in the day and age of Tinder hookups is a mind-fuck in itself.”
Getting bred makes her feel closer to her partners, which is why, off-set, she doesn’t get creampied by any and everyone—only her more serious romantic partners. “The thought of making your partner cum is so hot, but some random man from the streets cumming in me puts me at risk of a yeast infection, and no one wants that surprise the next day,” she says.
Power exchanges
“The D/s (Dominant/submissive) dynamic is central to all kink and BDSM play, including a breeding kink,” Engle says. It’s about giving and receiving control. “In breeding Dom/sub-type power-play, one is controlling the other to make them pregnant. It’s about the taking and giving of that total control.”
Primality
“It turns sex into a primal act that releases my inner beast,” says Matt, 31, who loves breeding and being bred. “It’s like we are just fucking to make a baby, just animals that need to get off.”
The primal nature of it all is connected to BDSM/power play. “With partners with vaginas, it feels like such an intense level of submission for them to let me breed them,” Matt says. “That they are so turned on and feral they would be willing to let me impregnate them is so hot, even if that’s not the intention in reality.”
Body-affirming
Megan, 33, is a proud, self-identified “cum slut.” In fact, it’s one of her “go-to” pet names in the bedroom, but she enjoys getting bred for another reason, too—it’s body-affirming. “As a very feminine-looking, plus-size woman, I can safely say that I have the stereotypical body for having children or procreating,” she says. “I have large breasts, a huge ass, a small waist, and hips that just scream ‘baby maker,’ so the idea of being bred or being used for procreating has always fallen into a positive place for me.”
Physical sensation
Simply put, raw sex and getting filled can feel fantastic. “When someone cums on you, it’s so warm and gooey, but INSIDE? The physical sensation of warmth filling up your pussy feels so good,” Blue says. “And honestly, I love the feeling of a man’s dick throbbing inside me as he cums. It’s better than a Hitachi for me.”
The risk factor
Again, breeding kinks are often arousing for the idea of impregnating your partner. Most people are not trying to actually get pregnant, but the potential of accidentally doing so can be a major turn-on. “For some, it’s undoubtedly about the risk involved with unprotected sex and pregnancy, as danger can be a huge turn-on,” Engle says.
However, some people hate the risk factor. It turns them off because they don’t want to end up with an unexpected trip to Planned Parenthood. Because of this, they only get bred while on birth control or if their partner has had a vasectomy.
How to reduce the risk of STIs and unwanted pregnancy
“Breeding kinks are practiced with intentional, enthusiastic, and fully negotiated consent,” Engle says. The stakes are high, so everything needs to be fully negotiated. People who practice breeding kinks usually take pregnancy/STI prevention methods. “It’s about playing with risk, not necessarily actually taking unnecessary risk,” she adds.
So, if you’re sleeping with multiple people, communicate with your partners about the last time you were tested and how many people you’ve had (un)protected sex with since getting tested. That way, they can decide for themselves whether they want to take the risk or not.
Even with planning and communication, there is a higher risk of STIs when engaging in unprotected sex than sex with a condom. So get tested frequently, at least every four to twelve weeks, depending on the number of partners you’re sleeping with.
